Chen moved slightly around in the bed trying to get into a more comfortable position not understanding exactly what had pulled him out of his slumber. As he was drifting back to sleep he heard it again, the sound that must have originally woken him, a whimper escaping the lips of the person next to him. Chen slung his arm around Minseok’s sleeping form hoping that the familiar touch would lull Minseok back to sleep. When the other didn’t let out a new sound of distress Chen allowed his eyelids to flutter closed taking note of the sound of rain drops in the background in a small corner of his mind before he allowed sleep to claim him again.
A loud scream echoes around the walls of the room causing Chen to sit up all sense of sleep leaving his mind as he looked down at Minseok’s pain covered face as the other slept through his nightmare. The rain must be triggering his memories, Chen thinks to himself as he leans over and tries to gently awaken the other by moving his sweat laced hair off his head. A second scream escapes Minseok’s lips and it causes Chen’s heart to ache.
“Minnie, it’s time to wake up now my love” Chen says trying to ease Minseok out of his nightmares, knowing from past experiences not to wake him up too forcefully. As Minseok begins to thrash around in the covers however, Chen knows that he has no time left to wake the other up gently for if he stays in his own head too much longer Minseok will not be the same for days to come.
“Minseok” Chen calls out loudly reaching down and pulling Minseok up into a seated position. Chen watches as the other’s eyes fly open wide with pupils dilated fully in fear as yet another scream escapes his throat.
“I’ve got you” Chen soothes wrapping his arms around the other’s back. Chen feels the shudders rock the other’s body from sobs as he slowly rubs small circles on Minseok’s lower back.
“Dae” Minseok gasps out and Chen feel’s Minseok squeeze his hands tightly against the fabric of his shirt. Chen had asked Minseok one day why he always held so tight to him after he had pulled the other out of his nightmares the response still made his heart ache. ‘I’m making sure you’re real’ Minseok had responded with a small blush on his checks.
“I’m here love, right here” Chen says leaning down and planting a kiss on the other’s sweaty forehead.
“The rain, there was so much rain” Minseok says and Chen rocks the other slightly trying to comfort him. “The bright light it was so bright I tried to swerve, but the rain” Minseok says between sobs. Chen’s heartbreaks when Minseok recounts the details of his nightmare because he knows they are actual events that Minseok can’t get out of his mind. “I was rolling, it was so loud and everything hurt” Minseok says and Chen feels the other’s grip on him tighten. Chen allows a couple tears to escape his own eyes, each time Minseok recounts the details he wants nothing more than to rewind time and trade places with the other.
“I’ve got you, you’re safe now” Chen assures, holding the other in his arms and trying to sooth the memories of the past, brought so close to the surface with the nightmare.
“I tried to get out, but I was trapped” Minseok says and Chen feels the other shake. “I called out, but no one came. The rain covered my screams” Minseok sobs. I should have tried to wake him up right when I heard the whimper; Chen scolds himself for not stopping Minseok’s nightmare sooner. The rain tonight must have intensified the nightmares, he thinks. As a roll of thunder echoes around Chen thinks back to a night so similar to this one.
~Flashback~
Chen sat staring at the weather forecast on the television watching as the storm got worse and worse. He tried to call Minseok again but heard the other’s cheerful voice as he was automatically connected to his voicemail. He hoped that the other had pulled over and taken refuge at a motel for the night and the storm was messing with the reception, but deep down Chen felt fear because he knew that something was wrong.
The sound of his phone ringing broke through the sound of the storm and the newscasters on the television screen and Chen jumped slightly before raising it up to his ear.
“Minseok, you had me so worried” Chen says into his phone relief flooding into every pour of his body until an unfamiliar voice spoke on the other line.
“I’m sorry sir, but are you Kim Jongdae” the voice asks and Chen feels his stomach drop.
“Yes” he answers already racing to grab his keys and slide on his shoes, because he knew he just knew something was wrong.
“I’m sorry but your husband Kim Minseok was in a terrible car accident earlier this evening” the voice said and Chen couldn’t hold back his tears as he lent his head against the wall of his and Minseok’s shared apartment. “He is in the intensive care unit of the Garden Grove Memorial Hospital. I’m sorry sir” the voice says before the line goes dead.
Chen remembers driving the short five miles to the nearest hospital, the ride feeling as if it lasted hours instead of just mere minutes. After parking his car he ran into the hospital and asked every person he came across for information on Minseok. He was ushered into a small waiting room and sat jittery for hours until a doctor came up to him.
“Kim Jongdae” the doctor asked after removing a surgical mask from his face.
“Me, sir” Jongdae said standing up and following the doctor as he led Jongdae through a couple hallways and to a door that lead to a small room that Jongdae could make out the sound of beeping machines behind.
“He is still in very critical condition. He has some major cuts that my assistants and I stitched up. He has a serious concussion and is still unconscious” the doctor says and Chen feels his heart ache at all the pain the Minseok must have been in. “Sir, there is one more thing” the doctor says and Chen takes in the way the doctor nervously folds the mask in his hands.
“Okay” Chen says wearily prompting the man to speak.
“Your husband’s car rolled over many times before it crashed down the side of the road beside many trees” the doctor says wearily. “During this time your husband received serious damage to his entire body, however, a majority of the injuries were centralized to your husband’s legs. Perhaps if I had gotten a chance to operate sooner or they had spent less time crushed under the bulk of the cars weight there could have been more for me to do” the doctor says dejectedly. Chen shuddered hearing the doctor talk.
“How bad is it doctor, is he going to have to walk with a limp for the rest of his life” Chen asks.
“No, there was nothing I could do to save them. Your husband he.. well he will never walk again” the doctor says.
“I don’t understand” Chen confessed to the doctor, his brain refusing to compute.
“I had to amputate” the doctor says before a page over the intercom calls him away leaving Chen with no further explanation.
The sight he saw when he walked into the hospital room, of Minseok lying unconscious with wires and tubes running to different locations of his body and an oxygen mask over his face hurt his heart. The bandages and gauze he saw littering the other’s pale face made him so terribly sad. However the sight of the other’s wrapped legs made him cry and wish that he were in the other’s place.
After crying Chen pulled himself together and swore that he would be strong. Strong enough for both of them because he knew the future would be testing.
~End of Flashback~
He hasn’t gone this deep into the memories for well over a year; Chen thinks to himself as a bolt of lightning flashes behind the curtain, brightening up the bedroom for a couple seconds and pulling him out of the memories of the past.
“Let’s go have some tea” Chen says and only begins to move once he feels the other nod his head. He stands up and pulls Minseok’s light body up into his arms. He holds the other bridal style, with Minseok’s arms wrapped around his neck, through the bedroom and into the small kitchen area. He gently leaned down and set Minseok down into one of the kitchen chairs. “We have some Chamomile right” Chen asks, not really expecting a response from the other, but knowing from past experience that it is best to keep Minseok included in some type of conversation when he is not directly touching the other. After filling a cup with water and setting it in the microwave to heat up Chen moved to the cupboard where he kept the teas that Minseok enjoyed when coffee wasn’t a choice. Once the microwave dinged Chen pulled the cup out and set a tea bag inside the hot water.
“Can you hold this while I carry you back to bed” Chen asked, holding the cup out to Minseok after he received a small nod from the other.
Back inside the bedroom Chen set Minseok carefully onto the bed and probed his back up with a spare pillow. He watched Minseok gingerly take a few sips from the cup as he carded his hands through the other’s hair. When Minseok was done with the tea he stood up and set the cup down on the bedside table before grabbing the lavender candles from his top dresser drawer.
After lighting the candles and letting the aroma that was supposed to help sooth Minseok fill the small space he walked back towards the drawer and grabbed the Tutsan oil.
“Do you want me to start with your hands or your back” Chen asks gently taking his seat back on the bed beside Minseok.
“Hands” Minseok said softly setting his left hand in Chen’s lap.
“For meeting you and being able to touch your hair” Chen starts to sing aloud as he rubs the oil between his own hands for a second to warm it up slightly before picking Minseok’s hand up gently and massaging it between his own to hands. “For meeting you and being able to look back at each other” Chen continues as Minseok lays his head atop Chen’s shoulder. “For getting to hug you and being able to cry when it gets tough” Chen sings and looks down to see Minseok closing his eyes. “I’m fortunate” he says before leaning down and planting a kiss against Minseok’s exposed temple. “for this beautiful world, for you staying” Chen sings and then has to collect himself because for days after the accident Chen wasn’t sure that Minseok would push through, but the other beside him was proof and for that reason he would do anything to make the other happy without blinking an eye. He had already been forced to picture a possible future without the other and it did not look inviting at all.
“Feels good” Minseok’s sleep heavy voice whispers and Chen leans down to plant another kiss to the other’s forehead. “In the harsh winds, even under a wet roof, the feeling of knowing that I’m not alone. Wearisome daily life, the arduous survival that by chance is not something pointless. Always having remained by my side, it’s because of an amazing person, you” Chen sings before laying Minseok’s one hand down and picking up the other. “For meeting you and being able to make the meals we share. For meeting you and being able to hold your numb hands. For getting to hug you and being able to comfort you even though it doesn’t help. I’m fortunate” Chen sings planting a kiss on Minseok’s exposed cheek.
Chen finishes massaging Minseok’s hand and lays it down beside the first admiring the beauty in the other’s face.
“They hurt” Minseok whispers breaking the calm in the room. Chen looks down to see a lone tear escape the corner of Minseok’s eyes.
“Don’t cry my love” Chen says quickly, raising a hand to wipe away the tear and leaning in to kiss Minseok’s forehead. “Why don’t we lie you down and I’ll fix it” Chen assures. Once he helps lean Minseok back and get him all comfortable on the bed Chen picks up the pot of Tutsan oil and remembers the first time something like this had happened.
~Flashback~
A sob woke Chen up from one of the small naps that he allowed his body to take sitting up in the chair beside Minseok’s hospital bed. Chen quickly snapped his gaze over to Minseok’s face to find the other boy awake, however, his excitement was short lived when he say the tears making their way down the other’s face.
“What’s wrong Minnie” Chen asked hoping out of the chair and standing beside Minseok.
“They hurt Dae. They hurt so bad, make it stop” Minseok cried out. Chen quickly reached for the call button tapping it and hoping one of the nurses or a doctor would come running in soon.
“Where does it hurt” Chen asked hands hovering over the bandages on Minseok’s head fearing the worst.
“My legs Dae, make it stop” Minseok cries again holding Chen’s gaze with a pleading expression; luckily one of the nurses came in and increased the medical drip hooked up to Minseok’s IV allowing him to slip back to sleep.
“Phantom pains” the nurse explains after seeing what Chen assumes must be a horrified expression on his face. “There isn’t much we can do for them right after surgery, because of the stitches and everything, except for pain medication” the nurse says checking all the other machines hooked up to Minseok.
“What do I do if it happens later on, once we are home and the stitches are gone” Chen asks, carding his fingers through Minseok’s soft hair.
“Sometimes a good massage to the cut off location helps” the nurse says. “Page me again if he needs me” she says before walking from the room.
~End of Flashback~
Chen rubs a new bit of Tustan oil into his hands to warm it before gingerly picking up Minseok’s right leg. Pushing the fabric of Minseok’s shorts aside Chen starts to carefully and gently rub at the scarred skin above where Minseok’s knee used to be. He hears the other sigh in relief as if he had just pulled a splinter out of a finger.
After repeating the same process on Minseok’s left leg, Chen carefully tucked a now sleeping Minseok back into bed. He stood up and blew the Lavender candles out before climbing into bed and wrapping an arm around Minseok’s waist. I’m very fortunate, Chen thinks to himself as he kisses Minseok on the forehead and falls back to sleep.
Author's Notes: First I would like to thank the person who left this prompt, although it isn’t exactly what you asked for I hope it will do. Second I would like to thank both mods for having this fest; I can’t even begin to imagine all the wonderful and beautiful stories that are going to result from this. And lastly I would like to thank you, yes you, for reading this story and hopefully enjoying it.
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seokmonster-mod.livejournal.com) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
seokmonstersfest2015-09-20 04:51 pm
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I was scrolling through the twitter fest when I saw the fic description and catch my attention, however when I start reading was when I truly recognize it as the one I left here for the fest. ;A;
It should be me thanking you, for choosing it and giving us this wonderful interpretation. Don’t worry :D I think that one of the best parts of these fests is getting the opportunity to read how the prompt you leave will transform once an author writes them (/;w;)/
I have too many feels while reading this, dear lord, Jongdae way of comforting Minseok while his nightmares just keep bringing him back to the day of the accident and the rain while he was in pain omg ;____;
Also, when the doctor told the Jongdae about Minseok legs /clenches heart/ everything hurt ;A;
“After crying Chen pulled himself together and swore that he would be strong. Strong enough for both of them because he knew the future would be testing” and that’s how you got me crying ;___;
Jongdae and Minseok being married was just precious and adding Chen singing to his husband while taking care of him, I will leave you here my tears and heart ;A; <///3 “For getting to hug you and being able to cry when it gets tough” Chen sings and looks down to see Minseok closing his eyes” /cries in the distance/ Sorry for leaving this long comment ;___;)/ ~but the bittersweet taste where we can still see them being happy with each other ;;; I really got happy and excited to be able to read this ;w; Thank you so much! ;;;
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thank you for writing this;;;