#66 Count Blessings Instead Of Sleep
Oct. 6th, 2015 06:01 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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seokmonstersfestTitle: Counting blessings instead of sheep
Pairing: Xiumin/Exo (OT12)
Side pairing(s): -
Rating: R
Word Count: 3100 words
Warnings: none
Summary: Minseok has trouble falling asleep at night so the members each suggest their own ways and remedies to try and help with his insomnia.
Author's Notes: I want to thank the mods for letting me adopt this lovely prompt! And to the prompter, I hope I did your lovely prompt justice. I also want to thank K and J for helping me with this and listening to me whine. You two are amazing and ily <3 This fic is not beta’d, or at least beta’d by me at 2 a.m.
Nights are different from day time. During the day, everything is hectic and busy, they barely have time to breathe. Even after coming back to the dorm, after finishing practices and schedules, it's still loud. Sometimes too loud but Minseok finds himself liking it more than the quietness that accompanies the night.
Sleep doesn't come easy at night, or doesn't even come at all but Minseok is used to it by now. It doesn't bother him as much as it used to but it still drains him, makes the stylists use more and more layers of makeup under his eyes to hide the traces of exhaustion, and just wears him out. He's considered taking sleeping pills to help him get at least a few hours of sleep at night, but the side effects are not something he wants to deal with. Can't afford to deal with because he's an idol, and collapsing on stage is frowned upon in this business. It's messed up really, but that's the price one has to pay in return for fame. And sometimes it makes Minseok wonder if all this is worth it, but then he stands on a stage and sees the smiles of thousands of fans, and it reminds him why he wanted to, still wants to do this.
*✧☆ﾟ.* I *✧☆ﾟ.*
It's sometime past 2 a.m. when they finally get back to dorm. Everyone is exhausted from the long schedule they had and some don't even bother to shower or eat, heading straight to their beds instead. Sleep is viewed as a luxury once you become a celebrity and all you want to do on a rare day off is take advantage of it.
Minseok is the last to take a shower, knowing that sleep won't come to him anytime soon. He's sitting on a chair in the kitchen scrolling through his phone and catching up on messages when someone sits beside him.
"No sleep again, hyung?"
Minseok recognizes the voice without having to turn around, he sighs tiredly and places his phone down on the table, "Not really, but it's okay. Why are you still up?" he turns around and catches the sad expression on Jongdae's face.
"It's not okay, you barely get an hour or two of sleep everyday."
"The van is ideal nap time."
"It still not enough." Jongdae sighs sadly and Minseok is about to say something and reassure him that it's okay but the younger's expression brightens up again, lips going back to their natural smile, "You haven't showered as well, right? Come shower with me and let me ease your knots. Maybe it'll help you sleep." Jongdae finishes with a smug smile.
"Right, because easing knots doesn't mean anything more than a massage." Minseok says with a raised eyebrow.
"Of course." the older shakes his head before following Jongdae to the bathroom.
Once they stand under the hot water, Jongdae's fingers start working on Minseok's neck while gradually moving lower and lower. Minseok doesn't realize how his back is resting against Jongdae's chest until he feels something poking him.
It's Jongdae's husky voice that does it for Minseok, "Want me to put you to sleep, hyung?"
"Please."
Jongdae presses Minseok against the wall before dropping down to his knees, the latter barely has time to catch the sound of a lube bottle opening before a finger circles his entrance and forces his eyes shut. It takes every ounce of self control in him to open them again because the sight of Jongdae wrapping his other hand around Minseok is not something the older wants to pass up on. Soon Minseok is reduced to a mess of soft grunts that are drowned by the sound of running water, except to Jongdae's ears of course.
Minseok comes with a broken moan of Jongdae's name and maybe it isn't a cure to his sleepless nights. But he's definitely not tense anymore.
*✧☆ﾟ.* II *✧☆ﾟ.*
Sometimes Minseok rolls around bed for hours, removing the blanket because it's too hot only to pull it back up again because it's suddenly too cold again. The pillow is soft, too soft, but once adjusted, it's suddenly too hard to sleep on. Everything is either too much or not enough and Minseok gets up with a sigh. Maybe the couch will be more comfortable. He thinks about taking his blanket with him but then just decides to wear socks instead.
Walking around the dorm without light is nothing new, Minseok has memorized each and every corner by heart now. What he doesn't expect is someone already lying on the couch so he debates on whether to wake the sleeping figure up to go sleep on a comfortable bed, or to just move to the other couch as quietly as possible. He chooses the latter before an unexpected sleepy voice breaks the silence, "Bed too uncomfortable?" the second youngest member asks.
"You could say so." Minseok answers, "Did you fall asleep on the couch again?"
"Mhmm, practice was a little too tiring." Jongin mumbles before stretching his arms out, "Cuddle with me, hyung?"
"That doesn't sound like a question." Minseok says, trying to hide the smile in his voice while making his way towards the younger.
"It isn't." Jongin breathes against the shell of Minseok's ear, cuddling him close. And maybe sleep still doesn't want to come but Minseok can't deny that the warmth of a second body against his, and the sound of an even breathing suddenly takes the restlessness away from him.
*✧☆ﾟ.* III *✧☆ﾟ.*
Maybe a late night snack will help, Minseok thinks while searching through the drawers for something light and edible. Ramen, ramen is good. Easy to make, won't make too much noise, and doesn't require a lot of energy. He's just about to grab the noodles when their leader walks into the kitchen.
"I see Chanyeol still left some."
Minseok hums in response before asking, "Want some?" Joonmyun shakes his head, "I'm not really hungry."
"Neither am I." Minseok answers, causing Joonmyun to furrow his eyebrows.
"Then how about I make us some tea?" his voice is always so patient, so calm, and Minseok really likes the sound of it. It's a nice balance to the loudness and ruckus the younger members cause at times. Minseok responds with a nod.
Chamomile tea tastes a bit funny and Minseok tries to refrain from making faces but Joonmyun notices anyway, soft laughter bubbling in his throat, "It's not everyone's cup of tea, literally. But it's a known remedy for sleepless nights."
"I'm your hyung, I should be the one taking care of you." Minseok says around his cup.
"There's nothing wrong with being taken care of sometimes."
"Says Exo's guardian."
"You already do so much for me, hyung. Let me do this one thing for you." the younger says, tone genuine and concerned. Minseok gives Joonmyun a tired smile before placing a hand over the latter's hand.
"You're a true gem, Joonmyun." he says with a squeeze to the younger's hand. Joonmyun smiles, cheeks turning pink, and that's enough of an answer for Minseok.
The tea might not work magic and make him sleepy. But it does calm his nerves and put his mind at rest.
*✧☆ﾟ.* IV *✧☆ﾟ.*
Music is nice, a getaway from the world. But once everything around you turns into music, it can be quite suffocating at times.
Minseok is scrolling through his playlist, skipping every single song there is. He's looking for something but he isn't really sure what it is and so he keeps on searching. Baekhyun is seated on the ground near the couch, noticing Minseok's struggle with the device in his hands before the older sighs and puts it down along with the earphones.
"You know, hyung, I've been told that I have a very soothing." he says.
"Are they boosting your ego at the company again?" Minseok responds with a question that lacks any form of bite. Baekhyun pouts.
"Aegyo doesn't work on me, Baek."
"Give me a chance. Let me sing you a lullaby and I guarantee that you'll fall asleep." Minseok resists the urge to playfully roll his eyes at the younger and makes his way down the couch, resting his head on Baekhyun's lap.
Baekhyun beams at him before playing with his hair, "I'm pretty sure this counts as cheating." Minseok says but Baekhyun's soft notes suddenly fill the room.
And Minseok listens with closed eyes. Listens to the way Baekhyun's voice raises at all the right places. Listens to the story told behind each word. Listens to the feelings that pour from the singer's voice. And lets himself be enchanted by the aura Baekhyun is able to create all the way from the stage they stand on together, to the walls of their living room.
Sleep might still play hide and seek with Minseok, but the goosebumps forming on his skin make up for it.
*✧☆ﾟ.* V *✧☆ﾟ.*
The nights can be long, too long. The silence almost deafening to Minseok's ears and as much as he wants to say he's used to it, there's no denial that loneliness finds its way to him. It's much easier to forget about it during the day but there's no running away from it at night. Not when everything is quiet. So quiet.
And then there's Luhan. Crawling into bed with Minseok. Wrapping his arms around him and holding him in place. They're used to this, have done it since their trainee days. And yet Minseok still needs it. Still holds on to Luhan when things get too much. Maybe it's their age factor. Maybe it's Luhan's soft nature that makes you feel warm, at home. And maybe it's just the way things are between them. But no one questions it.
No one questions the way Luhan stares into Minseok's eyes. The way he strokes the latter's cheeks. The way he places a soft kiss on the corner of the older's mouth. And the way Minseok leans in for a second, and a third kiss.
Maybe sleep is a foreign word to Minseok but it's okay because the arms that wrap around him, and the eyelashes that tickle his cheek makeup for endless sleepless nights.
*✧☆ﾟ.* VI *✧☆ﾟ.*
Sometimes Chanyeol grabs Minseok's wrist and leads him to his room, or what he likes to call his studio. Minseok doesn't really mind. It never ceases to amaze him how talented Chanyeol is. How the younger does everything with passion. Excels in anything he puts his mind to.
And today is no exception. Chanyeol is showing him a new song he has composed. Shows him the lyrics that goes with it. And even convinces him to try and sing along to it. Sometimes Minseok takes music for granted. But that's because it has crawled its way into every corner of his life. But it's times like this when he remembers why he started doing all this. Still does it. Why he wanted to become an idol.
Minseok finds himself stopping halfway and turning his attention to Chanyeol again. The way the younger's fingers instinctively drum against the desk. And the way he hums happily, raps, even sings to the song he has composed. The lyrics he has written. And the older’s heart swells. Chanyeol will make it far in life and Minseok is proud to witness that.
The upbeat music might not help Minseok fall asleep sooner, but it does remind him how much he appreciates everything and everyone around him.
*✧☆ﾟ.* VII *✧☆ﾟ.*
Stress is there. Stress is always there and sometimes it gets too much. So much that one feels drained out, exhausted even. But then there's Sehun. Sehun who crawls into Minseok's bed and offers. Pliant and obedient. It's like he knows when Minseok is about to burn out, and he stops it from happening.
Tonight Sehun crawls into his bed once again. Offers, always offers and never asks for anything in return. He moans when kisses land on his neck, always so sensitive to touch. And he gasps when a hand finds its way inside his pajamas. It's really hard to keep his voice down but he tries, really tries. Minseok always knows him so well. Knows how to touch and where to press. What to do in order to reduce Sehun into a mess of moans. Minseok knows, always knows and Sehun loves it.
Minseok likes to take care of others, and Sehun loves being taken care of. And maybe the nights are too long and sleep seems too far away but it doesn't bother Minseok. Doesn't irritate him. Doesn't stress him out. Because Sehun is there. He’s there taking care of Minseok too.
*✧☆ﾟ.* VIII *✧☆ﾟ.*
As an idol, one barely has enough privacy behind closed doors. So allowing oneself to do normal everyday things they used to do before becoming famous is a luxury now. But that doesn't mean Minseok doesn't miss it. Especially going to the movies. He can't even recall the last time he went to a movie without having to rent the whole place for them so others won’t invade their privacy. Won’t ruin the whole point of a movie experience inside a cinema.
Kyungsoo loves movies. Really loves them. So it's no surprise when he knocks on Minseok's door and suggests the newest blockbuster movie, with subtitles because learning multiple languages is important. Minseok brightly smiles and moves to the side, making enough space for Kyungsoo to lie down next to him, to cuddle close while the movie starts. They always do this, watch movies together and it's adorable to watch Kyungsoo insist on a second, and a third movie even though he falls asleep at some point with his head resting against Minseok's chest.
Sleep still doesn't come earlier than any other night but the way Kyungsoo breathes against Minseok's neck, hands clinging onto him protectively while a foreign movie is playing in the background strips the uneasiness right off of Minseok's tired frame.
*✧☆ﾟ.* IX *✧☆ﾟ.*
Sport is something Minseok loves almost as much as music and dancing. His happy place. But finding time for it is really hard. Finding energy is even harder especially after long schedules and practices. But then there's Yifan. Yifan who loves sports as much as Minseok does. They might have different interests but compromises are always made.
Some nights they play football, much to Minseok's delight. Some nights they play basketball because it's Yifan's turn to choose. And on other nights they settle for any game really. Even just going for a run or a bike riding.
Tonight though, Yifan insists that they do both, play football and basketball. They've had a really long day but Yifan still insists. And Minseok finds himself agreeing.
Yifan is the same age as Minseok, younger by months, but Minseok still finds strength in the younger sometimes. Maybe the reason for that is Yifan's determined nature. How he fights for what he wants. How he works for it. How he doesn't give up even when the odds aren't in his favour. Yifan always gets back up on his feet, and Minseok admires him for that. Accepts him as his leader, his duizhang.
They don't know how long they stay out playing in the cold breeze. Laughing whenever they fall over. Cheering when one of them earns a goal. It's nice, reminding Minseok of their times when they had less responsibilities. Old habits die hard but Minseok is sure that he doesn't want this habit to ever die. Even when Yifan scores all the goals during their basketball match. Because then Minseok gets to take his revenge during their football match.
And even though they're running around and sweating, Minseok still doesn't feel tired enough to sleep. But it's okay because the ache in his muscles feel good for once.
*✧☆ﾟ.* X *✧☆ﾟ.*
Being part of the M subunit means that language skills other than Korean are important. Not just musically to sing along songs, but out of respect for a different culture that has welcomed them with open arms.
Minseok spends his nights studying Mandarin. Repeating the words over and over again. Getting frustrated when he can't pronounce them correctly even though he knows how they're supposed to sound like.
And then there's Zitao who always offers help.
Tonight is no different. Zitao walks towards the kitchen for a glass of water but finds Minseok sitting on the living room floor with books and notes scattered around him everywhere. Zitao doesn't disturb his peace, instead goes for the kitchen to get his glass. After he returns, he sits next to Minseok and starts practicing with him. As much as Minseok insists that the younger should go back to bed and rest, Zitao just sits there and reassures him that it's okay.
They lose track of time, Minseok resting his head against Zitao's chest while repeating the words after the younger. Earning a kiss every time he gets the syllables right.
Although the sun is threatening to rise soon, sleep insists to keep hiding for a little longer. But Minseok is not irritated or annoyed. Not with the way Zitao is resting his head on the older's lap, features soft and breathing even.
*✧☆ﾟ.* XI *✧☆ﾟ.*
Minseok has always been one to listen rather than talk. He enjoys it. Enjoys the way people's eyes light up with passion, with a certain fire when they talk about things they love. He doesn't mind listening for hours, doesn't really get sick of it.
So when Yixing crawls into his bed sometime past midnight, Minseok doesn't mind listening at all. Yixing's voice is soft, like feathers and silk, echoing in the quietness of Minseok's room. The younger boy talks about dragons, and rivers of endless stars. Oceans of never ending dreams and nights with never setting suns. Yixing tells him about lands with evergreen fields and roads that lead to the other side of forever.
And sleep is still hiding behind magnificent mountains like in the stories Yixing tells him about, but Minseok finds calmness in the younger's words. Closing his eyes to imagine everything as vividly as he's told about.
*✧☆ﾟ.* XII *✧☆ﾟ.*
And eventually Minseok is lulled into sleep. His eyes close and he lets the colourful images take over his thoughts. And maybe it's Joonmyun's tea, or the way Luhan's lips move against his. Maybe it's the words that flow from Zitao's mouth, or the way Jongdae eases his aching muscles. The way Jongin curls around him, or the way Yifan smiles when he wins.
It could be the way Sehun wraps his arms around him, or the way Kyungsoo's head rests on his chest. Maybe it's Baekhyun's soft notes, Chanyeol's melodies, or Yixing's vivid colours. Or maybe, just maybe it's Minseok's body that finally has mercy on him.
Whatever the reason might be for Minseok to fall asleep, the last thought that runs through his mind before dreams take over him, is the reassurance that he is not alone in this.
Pairing: Xiumin/Exo (OT12)
Side pairing(s): -
Rating: R
Word Count: 3100 words
Warnings: none
Summary: Minseok has trouble falling asleep at night so the members each suggest their own ways and remedies to try and help with his insomnia.
Author's Notes: I want to thank the mods for letting me adopt this lovely prompt! And to the prompter, I hope I did your lovely prompt justice. I also want to thank K and J for helping me with this and listening to me whine. You two are amazing and ily <3 This fic is not beta’d, or at least beta’d by me at 2 a.m.
Nights are different from day time. During the day, everything is hectic and busy, they barely have time to breathe. Even after coming back to the dorm, after finishing practices and schedules, it's still loud. Sometimes too loud but Minseok finds himself liking it more than the quietness that accompanies the night.
Sleep doesn't come easy at night, or doesn't even come at all but Minseok is used to it by now. It doesn't bother him as much as it used to but it still drains him, makes the stylists use more and more layers of makeup under his eyes to hide the traces of exhaustion, and just wears him out. He's considered taking sleeping pills to help him get at least a few hours of sleep at night, but the side effects are not something he wants to deal with. Can't afford to deal with because he's an idol, and collapsing on stage is frowned upon in this business. It's messed up really, but that's the price one has to pay in return for fame. And sometimes it makes Minseok wonder if all this is worth it, but then he stands on a stage and sees the smiles of thousands of fans, and it reminds him why he wanted to, still wants to do this.
*✧☆ﾟ.* I *✧☆ﾟ.*
It's sometime past 2 a.m. when they finally get back to dorm. Everyone is exhausted from the long schedule they had and some don't even bother to shower or eat, heading straight to their beds instead. Sleep is viewed as a luxury once you become a celebrity and all you want to do on a rare day off is take advantage of it.
Minseok is the last to take a shower, knowing that sleep won't come to him anytime soon. He's sitting on a chair in the kitchen scrolling through his phone and catching up on messages when someone sits beside him.
"No sleep again, hyung?"
Minseok recognizes the voice without having to turn around, he sighs tiredly and places his phone down on the table, "Not really, but it's okay. Why are you still up?" he turns around and catches the sad expression on Jongdae's face.
"It's not okay, you barely get an hour or two of sleep everyday."
"The van is ideal nap time."
"It still not enough." Jongdae sighs sadly and Minseok is about to say something and reassure him that it's okay but the younger's expression brightens up again, lips going back to their natural smile, "You haven't showered as well, right? Come shower with me and let me ease your knots. Maybe it'll help you sleep." Jongdae finishes with a smug smile.
"Right, because easing knots doesn't mean anything more than a massage." Minseok says with a raised eyebrow.
"Of course." the older shakes his head before following Jongdae to the bathroom.
Once they stand under the hot water, Jongdae's fingers start working on Minseok's neck while gradually moving lower and lower. Minseok doesn't realize how his back is resting against Jongdae's chest until he feels something poking him.
It's Jongdae's husky voice that does it for Minseok, "Want me to put you to sleep, hyung?"
"Please."
Jongdae presses Minseok against the wall before dropping down to his knees, the latter barely has time to catch the sound of a lube bottle opening before a finger circles his entrance and forces his eyes shut. It takes every ounce of self control in him to open them again because the sight of Jongdae wrapping his other hand around Minseok is not something the older wants to pass up on. Soon Minseok is reduced to a mess of soft grunts that are drowned by the sound of running water, except to Jongdae's ears of course.
Minseok comes with a broken moan of Jongdae's name and maybe it isn't a cure to his sleepless nights. But he's definitely not tense anymore.
*✧☆ﾟ.* II *✧☆ﾟ.*
Sometimes Minseok rolls around bed for hours, removing the blanket because it's too hot only to pull it back up again because it's suddenly too cold again. The pillow is soft, too soft, but once adjusted, it's suddenly too hard to sleep on. Everything is either too much or not enough and Minseok gets up with a sigh. Maybe the couch will be more comfortable. He thinks about taking his blanket with him but then just decides to wear socks instead.
Walking around the dorm without light is nothing new, Minseok has memorized each and every corner by heart now. What he doesn't expect is someone already lying on the couch so he debates on whether to wake the sleeping figure up to go sleep on a comfortable bed, or to just move to the other couch as quietly as possible. He chooses the latter before an unexpected sleepy voice breaks the silence, "Bed too uncomfortable?" the second youngest member asks.
"You could say so." Minseok answers, "Did you fall asleep on the couch again?"
"Mhmm, practice was a little too tiring." Jongin mumbles before stretching his arms out, "Cuddle with me, hyung?"
"That doesn't sound like a question." Minseok says, trying to hide the smile in his voice while making his way towards the younger.
"It isn't." Jongin breathes against the shell of Minseok's ear, cuddling him close. And maybe sleep still doesn't want to come but Minseok can't deny that the warmth of a second body against his, and the sound of an even breathing suddenly takes the restlessness away from him.
*✧☆ﾟ.* III *✧☆ﾟ.*
Maybe a late night snack will help, Minseok thinks while searching through the drawers for something light and edible. Ramen, ramen is good. Easy to make, won't make too much noise, and doesn't require a lot of energy. He's just about to grab the noodles when their leader walks into the kitchen.
"I see Chanyeol still left some."
Minseok hums in response before asking, "Want some?" Joonmyun shakes his head, "I'm not really hungry."
"Neither am I." Minseok answers, causing Joonmyun to furrow his eyebrows.
"Then how about I make us some tea?" his voice is always so patient, so calm, and Minseok really likes the sound of it. It's a nice balance to the loudness and ruckus the younger members cause at times. Minseok responds with a nod.
Chamomile tea tastes a bit funny and Minseok tries to refrain from making faces but Joonmyun notices anyway, soft laughter bubbling in his throat, "It's not everyone's cup of tea, literally. But it's a known remedy for sleepless nights."
"I'm your hyung, I should be the one taking care of you." Minseok says around his cup.
"There's nothing wrong with being taken care of sometimes."
"Says Exo's guardian."
"You already do so much for me, hyung. Let me do this one thing for you." the younger says, tone genuine and concerned. Minseok gives Joonmyun a tired smile before placing a hand over the latter's hand.
"You're a true gem, Joonmyun." he says with a squeeze to the younger's hand. Joonmyun smiles, cheeks turning pink, and that's enough of an answer for Minseok.
The tea might not work magic and make him sleepy. But it does calm his nerves and put his mind at rest.
*✧☆ﾟ.* IV *✧☆ﾟ.*
Music is nice, a getaway from the world. But once everything around you turns into music, it can be quite suffocating at times.
Minseok is scrolling through his playlist, skipping every single song there is. He's looking for something but he isn't really sure what it is and so he keeps on searching. Baekhyun is seated on the ground near the couch, noticing Minseok's struggle with the device in his hands before the older sighs and puts it down along with the earphones.
"You know, hyung, I've been told that I have a very soothing." he says.
"Are they boosting your ego at the company again?" Minseok responds with a question that lacks any form of bite. Baekhyun pouts.
"Aegyo doesn't work on me, Baek."
"Give me a chance. Let me sing you a lullaby and I guarantee that you'll fall asleep." Minseok resists the urge to playfully roll his eyes at the younger and makes his way down the couch, resting his head on Baekhyun's lap.
Baekhyun beams at him before playing with his hair, "I'm pretty sure this counts as cheating." Minseok says but Baekhyun's soft notes suddenly fill the room.
And Minseok listens with closed eyes. Listens to the way Baekhyun's voice raises at all the right places. Listens to the story told behind each word. Listens to the feelings that pour from the singer's voice. And lets himself be enchanted by the aura Baekhyun is able to create all the way from the stage they stand on together, to the walls of their living room.
Sleep might still play hide and seek with Minseok, but the goosebumps forming on his skin make up for it.
*✧☆ﾟ.* V *✧☆ﾟ.*
The nights can be long, too long. The silence almost deafening to Minseok's ears and as much as he wants to say he's used to it, there's no denial that loneliness finds its way to him. It's much easier to forget about it during the day but there's no running away from it at night. Not when everything is quiet. So quiet.
And then there's Luhan. Crawling into bed with Minseok. Wrapping his arms around him and holding him in place. They're used to this, have done it since their trainee days. And yet Minseok still needs it. Still holds on to Luhan when things get too much. Maybe it's their age factor. Maybe it's Luhan's soft nature that makes you feel warm, at home. And maybe it's just the way things are between them. But no one questions it.
No one questions the way Luhan stares into Minseok's eyes. The way he strokes the latter's cheeks. The way he places a soft kiss on the corner of the older's mouth. And the way Minseok leans in for a second, and a third kiss.
Maybe sleep is a foreign word to Minseok but it's okay because the arms that wrap around him, and the eyelashes that tickle his cheek makeup for endless sleepless nights.
*✧☆ﾟ.* VI *✧☆ﾟ.*
Sometimes Chanyeol grabs Minseok's wrist and leads him to his room, or what he likes to call his studio. Minseok doesn't really mind. It never ceases to amaze him how talented Chanyeol is. How the younger does everything with passion. Excels in anything he puts his mind to.
And today is no exception. Chanyeol is showing him a new song he has composed. Shows him the lyrics that goes with it. And even convinces him to try and sing along to it. Sometimes Minseok takes music for granted. But that's because it has crawled its way into every corner of his life. But it's times like this when he remembers why he started doing all this. Still does it. Why he wanted to become an idol.
Minseok finds himself stopping halfway and turning his attention to Chanyeol again. The way the younger's fingers instinctively drum against the desk. And the way he hums happily, raps, even sings to the song he has composed. The lyrics he has written. And the older’s heart swells. Chanyeol will make it far in life and Minseok is proud to witness that.
The upbeat music might not help Minseok fall asleep sooner, but it does remind him how much he appreciates everything and everyone around him.
*✧☆ﾟ.* VII *✧☆ﾟ.*
Stress is there. Stress is always there and sometimes it gets too much. So much that one feels drained out, exhausted even. But then there's Sehun. Sehun who crawls into Minseok's bed and offers. Pliant and obedient. It's like he knows when Minseok is about to burn out, and he stops it from happening.
Tonight Sehun crawls into his bed once again. Offers, always offers and never asks for anything in return. He moans when kisses land on his neck, always so sensitive to touch. And he gasps when a hand finds its way inside his pajamas. It's really hard to keep his voice down but he tries, really tries. Minseok always knows him so well. Knows how to touch and where to press. What to do in order to reduce Sehun into a mess of moans. Minseok knows, always knows and Sehun loves it.
Minseok likes to take care of others, and Sehun loves being taken care of. And maybe the nights are too long and sleep seems too far away but it doesn't bother Minseok. Doesn't irritate him. Doesn't stress him out. Because Sehun is there. He’s there taking care of Minseok too.
*✧☆ﾟ.* VIII *✧☆ﾟ.*
As an idol, one barely has enough privacy behind closed doors. So allowing oneself to do normal everyday things they used to do before becoming famous is a luxury now. But that doesn't mean Minseok doesn't miss it. Especially going to the movies. He can't even recall the last time he went to a movie without having to rent the whole place for them so others won’t invade their privacy. Won’t ruin the whole point of a movie experience inside a cinema.
Kyungsoo loves movies. Really loves them. So it's no surprise when he knocks on Minseok's door and suggests the newest blockbuster movie, with subtitles because learning multiple languages is important. Minseok brightly smiles and moves to the side, making enough space for Kyungsoo to lie down next to him, to cuddle close while the movie starts. They always do this, watch movies together and it's adorable to watch Kyungsoo insist on a second, and a third movie even though he falls asleep at some point with his head resting against Minseok's chest.
Sleep still doesn't come earlier than any other night but the way Kyungsoo breathes against Minseok's neck, hands clinging onto him protectively while a foreign movie is playing in the background strips the uneasiness right off of Minseok's tired frame.
*✧☆ﾟ.* IX *✧☆ﾟ.*
Sport is something Minseok loves almost as much as music and dancing. His happy place. But finding time for it is really hard. Finding energy is even harder especially after long schedules and practices. But then there's Yifan. Yifan who loves sports as much as Minseok does. They might have different interests but compromises are always made.
Some nights they play football, much to Minseok's delight. Some nights they play basketball because it's Yifan's turn to choose. And on other nights they settle for any game really. Even just going for a run or a bike riding.
Tonight though, Yifan insists that they do both, play football and basketball. They've had a really long day but Yifan still insists. And Minseok finds himself agreeing.
Yifan is the same age as Minseok, younger by months, but Minseok still finds strength in the younger sometimes. Maybe the reason for that is Yifan's determined nature. How he fights for what he wants. How he works for it. How he doesn't give up even when the odds aren't in his favour. Yifan always gets back up on his feet, and Minseok admires him for that. Accepts him as his leader, his duizhang.
They don't know how long they stay out playing in the cold breeze. Laughing whenever they fall over. Cheering when one of them earns a goal. It's nice, reminding Minseok of their times when they had less responsibilities. Old habits die hard but Minseok is sure that he doesn't want this habit to ever die. Even when Yifan scores all the goals during their basketball match. Because then Minseok gets to take his revenge during their football match.
And even though they're running around and sweating, Minseok still doesn't feel tired enough to sleep. But it's okay because the ache in his muscles feel good for once.
*✧☆ﾟ.* X *✧☆ﾟ.*
Being part of the M subunit means that language skills other than Korean are important. Not just musically to sing along songs, but out of respect for a different culture that has welcomed them with open arms.
Minseok spends his nights studying Mandarin. Repeating the words over and over again. Getting frustrated when he can't pronounce them correctly even though he knows how they're supposed to sound like.
And then there's Zitao who always offers help.
Tonight is no different. Zitao walks towards the kitchen for a glass of water but finds Minseok sitting on the living room floor with books and notes scattered around him everywhere. Zitao doesn't disturb his peace, instead goes for the kitchen to get his glass. After he returns, he sits next to Minseok and starts practicing with him. As much as Minseok insists that the younger should go back to bed and rest, Zitao just sits there and reassures him that it's okay.
They lose track of time, Minseok resting his head against Zitao's chest while repeating the words after the younger. Earning a kiss every time he gets the syllables right.
Although the sun is threatening to rise soon, sleep insists to keep hiding for a little longer. But Minseok is not irritated or annoyed. Not with the way Zitao is resting his head on the older's lap, features soft and breathing even.
*✧☆ﾟ.* XI *✧☆ﾟ.*
Minseok has always been one to listen rather than talk. He enjoys it. Enjoys the way people's eyes light up with passion, with a certain fire when they talk about things they love. He doesn't mind listening for hours, doesn't really get sick of it.
So when Yixing crawls into his bed sometime past midnight, Minseok doesn't mind listening at all. Yixing's voice is soft, like feathers and silk, echoing in the quietness of Minseok's room. The younger boy talks about dragons, and rivers of endless stars. Oceans of never ending dreams and nights with never setting suns. Yixing tells him about lands with evergreen fields and roads that lead to the other side of forever.
And sleep is still hiding behind magnificent mountains like in the stories Yixing tells him about, but Minseok finds calmness in the younger's words. Closing his eyes to imagine everything as vividly as he's told about.
*✧☆ﾟ.* XII *✧☆ﾟ.*
And eventually Minseok is lulled into sleep. His eyes close and he lets the colourful images take over his thoughts. And maybe it's Joonmyun's tea, or the way Luhan's lips move against his. Maybe it's the words that flow from Zitao's mouth, or the way Jongdae eases his aching muscles. The way Jongin curls around him, or the way Yifan smiles when he wins.
It could be the way Sehun wraps his arms around him, or the way Kyungsoo's head rests on his chest. Maybe it's Baekhyun's soft notes, Chanyeol's melodies, or Yixing's vivid colours. Or maybe, just maybe it's Minseok's body that finally has mercy on him.
Whatever the reason might be for Minseok to fall asleep, the last thought that runs through his mind before dreams take over him, is the reassurance that he is not alone in this.
